With Cora not being with us now,
With Cora not being with us now,
there are so many times I find myself wondering.
Yesterday I thought about Cora so much as she would have been 18 months old. It is hard to even imagine her that old. It is hard to believe that much time has gone by.
I wonder what she would be doing as an 18 month old.
What new things would she be learning?
What words would she be saying?
What would be her favorite thing to eat?
Would her personality be more like her mama or daddy?
How long would her pretty brown hair be by now?
What would we be doing together during our days at home?
I wonder why Cora had to get sick.
Why did God choose to take Cora home so quickly?
Why didn’t He heal Cora?
Why did He choose to draw us and others closer to Himself through Cora’s death instead of through her healing?
I wonder what our lives would have looked like this fall if she was here and everything was still “normal”.
I wonder what it is going to be like to welcome this new little one into our lives.
Will he/she look like Cora?
Will we feel like first time parents again?
Will it be hard to use Cora’s baby things for this baby or will it be healing?
What will it be like to have our arms filled again?
Will it be easier to be around our friends kids again?
Will we always be overprotective parents because of what happened to Cora?
Today as we sang Jesus Loves Me in church.
I wondered why I was having to wipe away my tears because my heart was aching so intensely, instead of singing this sweet song with Cora in my arms.
I think many of these things I will always wonder.
I may never understand.
I will never fully comprehend God’s ways.
But I know that when it comes to my relationship with God
and my future with Him,
I don’t have to wonder.
I will never need to wonder about God’s love for me.
I will never need to wonder how my story will end.
A friend told me awhile back that this part of my life is like a really bad chapter in a really good book. While I don’t know what the rest of my story will hold, I can be confident about the ending. I know that the end of my story is so incredibly sweet that I can’t even begin to imagine.
That is the TRUTH that keeps me going.
That is the TRUTH that I will never have to wonder about.
Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
While we were in Banff, Joel had to try this.
The french fries, not the hotdog.
We do have hotdogs in Kansas.
Poutine is french fries
with cheese curds
covered in beef gravy.
That sounded awful to me,
but Joel said we had to try it.
He LOVED it.
And I have to admit…
it wasn’t that bad.
I liked the french fries and gravy.
The cheese curds, not so much.
Now Joel is convinced that I need to learn how to make poutine.
I know I said we would stock Cora’s at the end of August.
I know today is September 1st.
Where are the Cora dresses?
We are sewing LOTS of dresses.
We are trying out a few new ones.
I think we will have a giveaway soon.
Keep checking back.
Our sweet little Cora was on the news again last night. We love how, even now, people are still talking about her. She is famous!
Channel 12 did a follow up story on the progress of Cora’s Playground. We are so thankful for how the reporter, Megan Strader, has portrayed our story each time we have been interviewed. Thanks Megan!
While I HATE being on TV (somehow Joel got out of talking on this one), it is our prayer that through our story the Lord’s name would be famous.
You can check out the news segment here.
Sweet Baby Mac.
Even with all these mixed emotions, we love him/her so much already.
Seeing these pictures at our sono last week definitely made me want to hold our baby.
I think we are both ready for our arms to not feel so empty.
This little one was moving all over the place the day of the sono.
The technician was having trouble getting the pictures she needed.
Which is funny because they had to push all over my stomach to get Cora to move around.
She was a very calm baby and didn’t move that much.
We might have our hands full with this one.
But that is ok with us.
We could use a little excitement around here.
And we are anxious to know this little one that God has created just for us.